For many, the death of a parent is perhaps one of the most profound losses.
But losing your mother, no matter your age, changes your life forever.
Saying goodbye to her is a life changing experience that marks the end of a bond we have known all our lives.
Your mother is your first and forever friend.
She is never far from your thoughts and she is always in your heart.
Losing your mother can be a traumatic experience at any age.
You never really get over the loss, but you learn to live with it.
There is no right or wrong amount of time to mourn the death of your mother.
Sometimes these feelings can return years after the loss.
The loss may be sudden, or you may have witnessed a long decline in health.
The initial grief can be severe, followed by moments of sadness even as time passes.
Sometimes the effects of losing parents can still affect everyday life weeks or years later.
In this article, we talk about how life changes forever after losing a mother.
1. You learn to live with the sadness
The feelings of sadness will never subside. You just learn to live with them and control them.
We talked earlier in our article about why grief isn’t something you “overcome” but has many different phases and aspects.
You also can’t force yourself to just get over the loss of the most important person in your life.
That’s impossible. You just learn to deal with that sadness in the best possible way that also suits your personality.
You realize that you will always miss your parent, and that some days their absence is felt more than others.
And when those moments come, we will pay attention to them and not ignore them.
We can look at photos that evoke beautiful memories in us, we can also remember certain situations that are deeply engraved in our memory..
We must deal with our emotions when they overwhelm us.
After this confrontation you feel an inexplicable relief and immediately you feel better.
You feel like you’ve spent some time with that person again.
But eventually you learn to deal with the loss and move on.
One must find strength to go on with life without their support, love and hugs..
However, if you or someone you love is experiencing severe grief that doesn’t seem to waver or level off over months or years, you should talk to a doctor about ongoing complex grieving disorder.
You have to take these conditions seriously and contact a specialist. This will definitely help to deal with this situation appropriately.
This is a mental illness where grief affects your ability to function over a long period of time.
2. Your idea of life changes
After losing the most loved one in your life, the way you perceive your life changes.
Everything will suddenly be unimportant to you, because everything else is replaceable.
In the past, you may have worried about how well you’ll handle your finances this month, whether you’ll find another job, and you’ve worried about what other people think of you.
But after your mother is no longer with you, everything becomes unimportant to you.
Over time you will feel better but never again will you worry about unnecessary things like finances or anything like that.
All that matters now and that matters is that the other members of your family are healthy.
Also, you make an effort to spend as much time with them as possible.
Your focus is now on completely different things.
3. You will be more anxious
Even if your mother was seriously ill, you could not prepare yourself for this moment of parting with her.
The shock and emotions you felt in that moment can only be understood by the person who has been through it.
On the other hand, it could also be that your mother left you unexpectedly.
This situation triggers unmeasured sadness in you, but after a while you will also feel anxious.
Anxious because now you fear that you will lose another important person in your life.
Anxious because every call and every ring of your cell phone makes you think that something bad has happened to someone.
You are now preparing yourself in this way to hear bad news.
And for a very, very long time after that loss, you’ll only expect negative things, when that won’t be the case.
Many beautiful things will still happen to you, but without your mother, who you would call immediately to tell her about it..
Moments of hope
Don’t get us wrong, because in the end we are all just human beings who, after some time, feel hope again.
Even if it is hard to believe, not everything will be negative.
You will strive to fight grief and get on with your life as normally as possible.
You may feel relief, especially if your mother was struggling with chronic illnesses that no longer plague her.
You feel this way because you found it difficult to look at her suffering and pain.
You may feel relief from the conflicts or pressures that came with being in a foster relationship.
Maybe you’re thankful to God that he eased her pain and put her soul in a better place now.
You may even feel a renewed sense of gratitude for your own life and an increased ambition to take advantage of every minute that is available to you and your loved ones.
You feel that you need to make better use of your life and pay much more attention to the people around you.
Death can both bring us together and tear us apart, and there are many different factors involved.
Your mother’s death will change you.
And from the core.
This change is probably the only predictable part of the entire process – a process that will break, overwhelm, and build you up again.
You have to go through this process and it will definitely take a long time.
Because it is about the person who brought you into the world, who gave you their love and care unconditionally..
The only way out is to ride each wave as it comes while remembering to breathe and move on.