I recently read a study that claims the smarter the man, the less chance there is that he will cheat on you.
It wasn’t entirely clear to me what intelligence actually has to do with fraud. Maybe that’s because I’ve seen the very smartest men cheat.
They know exactly how to do it, so no one doubts or invents anything.
Then they cheat too, but just don’t get caught. Or?
It is more logical that emotional intelligence plays a role in this case. But I’ll write about that a little later.
Of course, I’m not saying that the study is wrong, just that it doesn’t correspond to my personal opinion.
So, is this really a serious criterion to consider when dating?
7 Traits you’re forever should have
After that, I thought and did a little research to see which criteria are particularly important when two people want a long-lasting and meaningful relationship.
Here’s what I found out.
7. He makes you laugh
Of course, this isn’t the most important thing, but it’s a good sign if your partner can make you laugh. But also vice versa.
If he laughs at you, that’s great because men always say their humor is too different from women’s.
It means that you two have a similar sense of humor and that your relationship will be brighter and happier.
Not only that, but also that the others will feel more comfortable in your company and enjoy meeting with you.
6. Respectful Conduct
No matter what the interpersonal relationship is, you have to show respect for it to work well. Or rather, that it works at all. Without respect, it is difficult, if not almost impossible, to have a meaningful partnership.
When people don’t show respect for one another, arguments are more common. On the other hand, if they communicate calmly and lovingly, for example, and act respectfully, there is more room for productive conversation and long-lasting marriage.
Because then both partners can also grow and develop personally and for themselves without fear that the other person will not be respected.
5. Willingness to compromise
The ability to compromise plays an important role in the first relationship.
Once you’ve decided to spend life with your partner, pay attention to how they feel about compromise.
Does he have a hard time finding a middle ground with you that is okay for both of you? If so, you should reconsider if he’s right for you.
Because different situations can happen in life and they will often not be favorable for both of you. Very often people have to find solutions that are somewhere in the middle of what they want.
It would be best that they are so similar that there is no need to compromise. Such cases are of course rarer.
4. Friends and family
He puts as much effort into your loved ones as you do into his.
Why is that important?
In the beginning maybe not so much, but as time goes by, this aspect becomes more and more important.
Does he spend enough time with your family? Does he want to get to know your friends and meet them, or do you always see them alone?
But you should have a healthy dose here. It can be nice to be together anytime, anywhere, but it’s also healthy to take time for yourself and visit your friends or family alone every now and then.
Because they certainly have topics and conversations that you would rather have alone. Not because your partner isn’t allowed to hear them, but because some conversations really have nothing to do with him and wouldn’t be interesting for him at all.
It’s the same with his friends and family. It’s great if you visit them together and meet up with them. But it can be productive and very good for your relationship if he does the same thing sometimes.
3. Helpfulness and support
These two qualities stand together because they are both similar and different. If the man has one of them, it is not a matter of course that the other will also come along.
Men often say that they would like to help or that they will support you, but in fact they don’t. It is therefore important that these qualities are really present.
Why are these two also crucial for a long-lasting relationship?
When he supports, understands, and builds you up, especially in difficult times, when you can count on him, when he is always there for you and wants to help you, then you feel safe and fearless. We know that nothing is more important for a woman than to feel safe and supported.
2. Emotional Intelligence
I mentioned it above and it proudly ranks second on our list. And rightly so!
This type of intelligence is, in my opinion, even more important than intelligence in the general sense.
Men who possess this intelligence can correctly perceive and deal with the feelings. Not only with his own, but also with those of other people.
He can easily talk about his (and your) emotions and communicate openly. As a rule, such men also have a high degree of empathy. You can better understand yourself and your feelings. They also admit when they’ve done something wrong and don’t assign blame.
1. The same core values
Of course you don’t think about the same taste in music (although that would be nice too), but more about important things for a life together.
Such as: family issues, marriage, children, housing situation, finances, plans for the future, etc.
You can see that these things are crucial for a harmonious relationship and it is impossible to have one if these core values are not aligned.
Therefore, you should discuss them clearly and openly with your partner. This can also be found out through casual conversation, so you don’t have to force her at all. But, once you’ve come to any realizations, use them to build a foundation.
If they don’t match your ideas about life together, you should definitely (the sooner the better) address these things to find out if you have understood everything well. But also, of course, to share your opinions and wishes.
It’s difficult when your core values aren’t similar or the same, but that’s a clear sign to put your relationship to the test and see if it makes sense over the long term. If not, a breakup makes more sense than being in a long-term relationship (or even marriage) with someone who doesn’t share and support your values.
There is one more very important thing, besides the above, and that is:
He is willing to put a lot of work into your relationship.
What does a lot of work mean?
If he (just like you) invests a lot of time, effort, patience, but also ideas and makes an effort for the sake of both of you, it means that you and your relationship are important to him. But not only that, but also that he takes all this seriously and wants to develop it further!
And what feels better than constant progress and a lot of understanding in the relationship that is harmonious and supportive?
If your partner possesses all of these qualities, you can be calm and happy. You have chosen well.