Why are borderliners so attractive? It may sound strange to you, but borderliners can be very attractive. Although borderliners are very complex personalities, there are eight simple reasons why they are so attractive.
People with borderline personality disorder often have tumultuous relationships, whether romantic or even platonic. Romantic relationships pose particular challenges for people with BPD and their partners.
The symptoms of BPD can lead to constant mood swings.
For example, a person with BPD may be loving and caring, but their emotional state can change in a matter of minutes.
This can cause them to push away the partner they were just close to. Despite all this, borderlines can be very attractive in relationships.
And why this is so, why borderliners are so attractive, we will explain to you using eight simple reasons.
But before we tell you why Borderliners are so attractive, we should first explain what Borderliners are and how they behave in love.
Borderline personality disorder and love-relationship behavior
The term borderline personality disorder has been used since the 1930s to describe a condition borderline between neurosis and psychosis.
Today, this term also describes a disorder in the area of emotions, inner turmoil and self-image.
People with borderline personality disorder desperately want a successful romantic relationship, but the problem is their behavior, which over time completely turns people off.
However, their need for closeness and intimacy is so strong that they are able to completely hide their problematic symptoms in order to win over the person they like.
This is already one of the reasons why borderliners are so attractive. But there are other reasons why this is so.
Borderline personality disorder is particularly problematic in love because it is associated with an unclear self-image and feelings of worthlessness.
Those affected constantly seek validation of their own importance from another person in order to have a sense of identity and belonging.
So naturally they reject their partners because they presented themselves in a very different light at the beginning of the relationship.
The problem arises when her excessive need for love leads to a one-sided relationship in which the other person constantly has to fill the emptiness felt by their ailing partner.
Borderline Personality Disorder and Love – Symptoms
Because borderline personality disorder is an emotionally unstable personality, they are individuals with whom it is very difficult to form quality close relationships.
But when they do, maintaining relationships is sometimes quite difficult and exhausting.
You should be prepared for difficulties that will surely arise as a result of the disturbance. Therefore, we recommend that you educate yourself about the following symptoms of people with borderline personality disorder in close relationships:
- emotional instability, accompanied by vague outbursts of emotion,
- distorted self-image and feelings of inferiority,
- frequent mood swings from anger to depression,
- impulsive and aggressive outbursts,
- vague self-awareness,
- frequent change of friends, work, values and goals,
- rapid alternation of idealization and degradation of the partner,
- frequent outbursts of jealousy,
- fear of being alone.
Early childhood experiences have been shown to play almost the most important role in the development of the disorder:
- excessive criticism,
- lack of attention,
- Neglect,
- physical or psychological abuse and numerous other circumstances
All of these childhood circumstances can be a trigger for the development of a personality disorder that is already present in a person’s genetic background.
Why are borderliners so attractive?
On the internet one can read a range of different experiences from people who have been or are in a relationship with partners who have borderline personality disorder.
Of course there are both positive and negative experiences, just like in any other relationship.
Borderliners are very complex personalities and it is difficult to even imagine what is going on in their mind at any given time.
Based on their characteristics and how they behave in a relationship, we have formulated eight reasons why borderliners are so attractive.
1. Borderline affection feels great
When men and women with BPD want to be nice to you, they’re really good at it. Then they radiate a very positive energy that attracts you like a magnet.
Every part of her body and every movement is then pure magic. Yes, yes, that’s what borderliners are like, if they want to be like that.
In that moment you fully understand why Borderliners are so attractive. They look like the ideal partners with perfectly beautiful manners.
You always want to be with them and proudly show them to your friends and to the whole world.
However, they are aware of their effect on you and use them skilfully. That spices up the whole situation, and then they become even more attractive.
Of course, in such situations you have to be careful not to lose your footing. Her smell is simply irresistible.
It is very important not to lose control of yourself because then you will become obsessed with that person.
Borderliners know how the game works and come across as irresistible.
At the beginning of a relationship, you probably only see the bright side and fall in love with her. But as the relationship develops, the masks fall and the true side comes out.
That’s why it’s very important to keep a cool head when you meet someone.
2. People with BPD are exciting
It’s not the borderline personality disorder that really appeals to us, but the unpredictability that is characteristic of people with this disorder.
And that’s also a reason why borderliners are so attractive. With borderliners, you never know what’s going to happen next.
A change of mood that goes from one extreme to the other is characteristic of borderliners. If your Borderliner is in a good mood, you’ll be in a good mood because of him.
Right now, your partner is ready for shopping, rock concerts, crazy night parties, speeding around town and even crazier things.
At such moments, borderliners enjoy passionate in risky, public places.
All of this is of course very exciting, and sometimes it feels like pure adrenaline.
It’s clear why you’re so attracted to your borderline at this moment. But this intoxication of feelings not only takes you to the top, but also to the bottom.
Affective mood swings are characteristic of borderliners, which usually range from a super good mood to a deeply depressed mood.
The partner’s mood can change in an instant, meaning they can become depressed, anxious, and even angry. Unfortunately, the situation then becomes anything but exciting.
3. Secrets
Secrets, secrets, when will we know all the secrets?
Borderline personality disorder can sometimes take forms that are very difficult to describe and explain. Sometimes such phenomena border on something mysterious and mystical.
Mysterious is always attractive. Mysterious things sometimes seem like something forbidden. And forbidden things are always attractive.
Remember the story from the Bible about Eve and the forbidden fruit. Such a situation seems very interesting for human nature.
If we all knew everything on planet earth, boredom and maybe depression would probably reign supreme.
Humans are extremely curious by nature. Most of them love mysteries and are attracted to everything that is unknown to them. This is why mysterious people are so attractive.
Borderliners don’t talk about their past love lives at all, except in riddles, and they answer questions incompletely or with counter-questions.
They love to play and have fun and create tension in their interlocutor. All of this is another reason why borderliners are so attractive.
4. Your soulmate
Borderliners are characterized by an identity disorder, i.e. by a persistently unclear self-image or sense of self.
This trait is reflected in relationships in such a way that the borderliner takes on the traits of his partner. This is all the more pronounced when the borderliner has strong feelings for his love partner.
In this way, the borderliner becomes like you, adopting all of your characteristics and habits in speech and body movements.
It makes you feel like you’re with someone you’ve known all your life.
Because the Borderliner subconsciously wants you to like them as much as possible, they become, in a way, a better version of you.
You will feel like you are with your soulmate . Someone you completely understand and with whom you share the same opinions and worldviews.
This is another reason borderlines are so attractive in romantic relationships.
Of course, over time, you’ll understand what’s really going on, because the Borderliner will have their own mood swings and show their true colors.
But at the beginning of the relationship, he really seems like your soulmate.
5. Passion makes you do the craziest things
You know that feeling when your blood boils in your veins? Here it becomes very clear why borderliners are so attractive in such situations.
Every time you bring emotion into something, the logic disappears. So the fact of the matter is that passion drives us to do crazy, illogical things that we wouldn’t do in our right mind.
Add to that the fact that your partner is incredibly attractive and seductive and your feelings and hormones take over.
All logic falls by the wayside. We are all occasionally weak to a person’s beauty and act completely irrationally in such situations.
When we are deeply in love with someone, that person appears to us as the most beautiful person in the world.
Beauty sometimes completely blinds us and then we are unable to see the bad parts of someone. Or we don’t want to see it at all.
We sacrifice ourselves completely for our relationship, hoping it will work. We will do everything to ensure that the relationship with the ideal partner is a success.
Love makes people do really stupid things. However, it is the emotion that sets us apart from all other species. It also keeps us from being robots.
It is also very important to understand that there is a big difference between love and passion. You have to be able to distinguish between the two because love is something you give.
6. Protective instinct
Sometimes our protective instinct is the reason we are so attracted to borderliners.
The borderliners are certainly not the happiest people in the world, but from the stories they tell us we can conclude that they are the unhappiest people in the world.
You will hear many stories from your borderline partner about how mean their exes were to them, how their parents abused them, how mean the world was to them.
Such stories trigger a protective instinct in us and we feel the need to help our borderliner. Then we just want to hug him and offer him a shoulder to cry on.
In the end you are convinced that this person was never loved and that you are the hero who saves her day!
At that moment, the Borderliner seems like a cute, injured kitten that you found on the side of the road that needs help and care.
This is another reason why borderliners are so attractive.
Although these stories are true and horrifying, once again you must understand that you cannot save some people.
It’s not your responsibility and it’s not your job. Relationships are not about helping your partner succeed in life. Only we can push ourselves to improve.
7. Even platonic love can be full of attraction
People with borderline personality disorder often have platonic love.
Platonic love is often defined today as a feeling toward a person for whom we have a great deal of love, loyalty, and affection, and we express that love on a purely psychological level and communicate it without love behavior.
Such a relationship is most comparable to a deep friendship in which there are no love needs.
Still, attraction does exist in friendship, and more often than you might think. Most men and women who are platonic friends are still attracted to each other.
In most friendships between different genders there is at least a small degree of attraction. And if she’s drawn to one partner more than another, it’s probably the man.
Evolutionarily, the mating instinct is believed to influence them. This seems to be the case even when both parties claim to have genuine platonic intentions.
8. Sometimes you enjoy the drama
Perhaps the reason Borderliners are so attractive is within yourself.
Borderliners can be great, but beneath the glossy surface lies something else entirely. Something that’s not great at all.
So in the beginning you have a partner who seems ideal for a crazy but also serious relationship, marriage and family.
But over time things start to change and the Borderliner occasionally shows you a whole new face. Due to emotional instability and unclear emotional outbursts, you occasionally get caught up in various dramas.
This is typical borderline behavior, especially in romantic relationships. It’s a warm-cold game that borderliners play unconsciously because they can’t help themselves.
But what’s appealing about all of this, you ask? Basically nothing.
It is possible that you will enjoy this game that your borderliner is preparing for you. You just enjoy the occasional love drama.
It sounds strange, but that’s another reason why borderliners are so attractive.
Maintaining these relationships becomes a major challenge and with that, the situation gets even hotter. The problem is that the hot-cold game eventually ends with your borderliner eventually leaving you for good.
Conclusion
Borderline is a borderline personality disorder or, in layman’s terms, an emotional personality disorder.
Borderliners are beautiful, ugly, mystical, weird, different, radiate sadness, are lonely and much more. Sometimes even insecure and unintelligent people have more success in relationships than these intelligent people.
The key to everything is your approach. Their empathy is a thousand times greater than yours, their feelings of sadness or happiness are a thousand times greater than yours.
In fact, it is a much milder illness than the permanent mental illnesses, but it resembles and resembles them in certain stages.
Love, friendship, the feeling of not being alone is what stabilizes borderliners because they have a great fear of loneliness and rejection.
Relations with them are sometimes very tumultuous, but there is never a dull moment with them.
In this whole jumble of emotions and behaviors, you’ll find many reasons why the Borderliner will be very attractive to you.
